Why Neurodiversity Affirming Practices Are In and Shaming Is Out: A Personal Letter from Neurodivergent Founder of EduAndYou, Samantha Kilburn

Hello there! I’m Samantha Kilburn, the proud neurodivergent founder of EduAndYou. Today, I want to share something close to my heart about why neurodiversity affirming practices are absolutely in and why shaming neurodivergent individuals is out. From stimming to children's books, here's a personal account on what neurodiversity affirming practices mean, why they matter, and how you (yes, you!) can implement them into your classroom or home-setting.

What Does Neurodiversity Affirming Mean?

First, let’s break down what neurodiversity affirming actually means. Neurodiversity affirming practices are the ideas that neurological differences like autism, ADHD, dyslexia, etc.. are natural variations of the human brain rather than a disorder that needs to be fixed. Google defines neurodiversity affirming practices as, "Neurodiversity-affirming practices are healthcare, educational, and social approaches that accept and celebrate neurological differences (e.g., autism, ADHD, dyslexia) as natural human variations rather than deficits to be fixed"

Affirming practices are those that embrace these differences, celebrate unique strengths, and provide support without judgment. Why does this matter? Well, take it from a neurodivergent person herself!

My Journey to Accepting Being Neurodivergent

When I was first told that I had a neurological condition and neurodivergence, it felt like pieces of myself finally fit. All of a sudden, it made sense why I saw the world through a different lens, why I felt so different from my peers, and why I never felt understood.

It took me a while to accept the fact that I was different, but then I came across the phrase, "different, not less." It's true! Being neurodivergent doesn't make me any less intelligent, beautiful, or kind. It doesn't change my drive for being a triple-major or my desire to build EduAndYou. What it does change, though, is how I experience the world, and that is a very important factor in my story.

As an adolescent I felt shamed for stimming and I experienced a lot of hate from my peers for how I interacted with the world. It wasn't until I started implementing neurodiversity affirming practices into my own life that I felt understood. I started stimming freely, and all of a sudden how I saw the world was a gift, not a deficit.

How Neurodiversity Affirming Practices Can be Used in Education

If you’re studying education or working with learners, this approach is a game-changer. It means:

• Recognizing that every child learns differently.

• Creating inclusive environments where all kids feel safe and valued.

• Using strategies that build on strengths rather than focusing on “fixing” weaknesses.

  
  

This mindset helps children thrive and builds a foundation for lifelong confidence and success.

A child using sign language, courtesy of Wix Media.

The Dark Side of Shaming: Why It’s Time to Say Goodbye

Now, let’s talk about shaming. Shaming neurodivergent individuals - whether it’s calling them “lazy,” “weird,” or “difficult” - has been a harmful practice for far too long. It creates barriers and lowers self-esteem.

I know this firsthand. Growing up neurodivergent, I faced plenty of moments where I was made to feel “less than” because I didn’t fit the typical mold. But here’s the truth: shaming doesn’t help anyone. It only pushes people away and ignores their potential.

Instead, we need to foster empathy and understanding. When we replace shame with support, great things happen!

How to Spot and Stop Shaming in Educational Settings

• Watch out for language that labels kids negatively.

• Avoid comparing children to one another.

• Encourage curiosity about differences rather than judgment.

• Promote positive reinforcement and celebrate small wins.

• Read diverse children's books in the classroom.

• Encourage curiosity, even if it doesn't "fit the mold."

  
  

By doing this, educators and parents can create nurturing spaces where all children feel empowered.

How EduAndYou Supports Neurodiversity Affirming Practices

At EduAndYou, we’re passionate about making educational content accessible and inclusive for everyone. Our goal is to provide resources that help early childhood and education majors, parents, and children embrace neurodiversity with open arms.

Here’s how we do it:

1. Neurodiversity Affirming Children's Book Reviews - We offer reviews of neurodiversity affirming children's books, so your child and their peers can understand neurodiversity in a way that feels right for them.

2. Self-Advocacy Insights - Our blog uses real-life experiences from a neurodivergent and disabled person herself to help advocate for systemic changes.

   
   

By expanding these resources, we hope to build a future where every child’s unique brain is celebrated!

Practical Tips for Embracing Neurodiversity in Everyday Life

Ready to put neurodiversity affirming practices into action? Here are some simple, practical tips you can start using today:

• Listen Actively: Pay attention to how children express themselves and respect their communication styles.

• Adapt Environments: Create quiet corners, use visual schedules, or provide sensory tools to support different needs.

• Encourage Strengths: Help children feel proud of themselves by saying "Wow! Are you so proud of yourself?"

• Model Acceptance: Show kindness and openness about differences in your language and behavior.

• Educate Yourself: Keep learning about neurodiversity through books, podcasts, and trusted websites. EduAndYou has lots of resources on our page for learning more about neurodiversity.

  
  

Remember, small changes can make a huge difference in a child’s life.

Thanks for reading my personal letter on this important topic! If you want to learn more or get involved, check out EduAndYou for resources and community support. Let’s celebrate every brain and every learner, because everyone deserves to be seen, heard, and valued!